sound bite

nobody said it was easy. its such a shame for us to part. nobody said it was easy. no one ever said it would be this hard.
oh take me back to the start.

you've got to believe i cant believe it either. i dont know who that was but she wouldnt be my friend if i knew her. we dont let her out often. shes more than a little strange. you've got to listen, you've got to hear me. hear me out. let me make things better. i dont think i can be better if i cant try to make things better. even if i cant make things better i need to know that i cant.

the uncertainty feels akin to my intestines being ripped out through my feet, my eyeballs being rubbed over with a combination of sandpaper and vinegar, my knee caps moving spots just as i fall to my knees. or so i imagine anyway. the other stuff, the stuff i shouldnt care about is different. its as if my heart is wrapped in layers of wrapping paper and each time i think about it another layer is ripped away. i can hear it tearing.

im waiting to see what my present looks like.